STOP

Oh, if cats had thumbs… they'd rule the world, no questions asked. Now, as fellow feline fanatics, you probably know that cats rule the world, but there are people who dispute this claim with a wave of a hand (weirdos). But if only cats had thumbs and were able to type posts all over the interwebs, all these other people would know of cats' greatness without us, feline fanatic fans, needing to explain to them that cats do, in fact, rule the world.

Cats' posts on Facebook would probably be of an exclusive cat pawrty that you're definitely not invited to. Cats' posts on X (or Twitter) would be status updates on the fullness level of their bowls, and how their human cat slaves are slacking off in their one job of catering to their every need. Cats' posts on Instagram would be the most fabulous feline photos you've ever seen, absolutely breathtaking and envy-inducing. Cats' posts on TikTok would be… well, cat videos, of course.

We gathered a sample of some cat posts they'd probably post, if only they had thumbs. And will. And the ability to type in English. But that's not a lot, right? It's just some simple steps cats need to take before completely dominating the entire world.

Is your inbox feline too professional? Add some cats falling off counters. Subscribe here!

You may be a cat lover, but are you a true cat connoisseur? Do you find yourself thinking about cats every second of every day? When there is an awkward pause in small talk, do you break the silence with random, yet mysterious, cat facts? Do you have at least one cat at home, or purrhaps, one of each variety? If so, then welcome to the club! We're something of expurrts of cats here at I Can Has Cheezburger, seeing as we're the who's who of all things cat-related on the internet. We're every cat purrson's dream - we wake up, go to work, and talk about cats literally all day. Yes, you can be jealous of us.

We love cats so much that we went out and got a job that uses our cat knowledge and expurrtise to our advantage. We know where to find the silliest cats on the internets every day, and then give them to you to make your day fluffier, funnier, and purrfectly more feline. They may not be any replacement for your cute kitties at home, but they'll get the job done and put a smile on your face until you can clock out and rush home to kiss their tiny little heads. 

And you know what the best part is? They do it all simply by being cats - the most purrfect creatures to ever exist. Now you can say you're a true cat connoisseur.

We have to say that over our time writing for ICHC, we have seen the cat ,distribution system make some strange deliveries. It has once delivered a kitten to a couple on a picnic - at two in the morning. It has once delivered a kitten to someone via the Starbucks drive-through - just on a random day, someone showed up with a backseat full of kittens, and one barista had to go home early. Kittens were once delivered to a church in a box - a suspicious box that required the requesting of a bomb squad. 

And still, even with everything that we have seen so far, this delivery might be the most ridiculous one. Out of nowhere, as this man was living his normal life, a kitten suddenly flew into his room through the window. Just like that. Maybe he put in a request with the cat distribution system, we don't know, but either way, we did not know that it could do same-day deliveries via the sky. 

The afternoon of a working day can be quite the drag. Especially if you happen to be working in a western office where they do not offer nap time. And after consuming your fourth or fifth caffeinated beverage, your brain might be wired awake, but your bodily sensations are rather dull.

Making it tough to actually care about what is going on in front of you. Which is why we wanted to get you back into gear with this collections of hilariously unique If i fists I its photos of felines, to inspire your creativity and to remind you that sometimes all you need is a slightly different pawspective to what you had only moments before to make all the difference to your day. So find yourself a quiet spot to indulge in this feline delight, and when you are done, purrhaps you will yourself enjoy search for a spot to squeeze into…

Is your inbox feline too professional? Add some cats falling off counters. Subscribe here!

A cat adoption story of "From Rags to Riches" always moves a feline fan's heart. We know cats, and we know the hardships strays are going through in the streets. But that's why it can heart the heart even more when we can guess a cat didn't simply rise from rags to riches - but was in riches, robbed of them by being dumped outside, living in the rags. And it's easy to guess - when the stray is extra friendly, like they look for an opportunity to return to the love, warmth, and nurturing they once knew. And it breaks the feline fan's heart.

But we're not here to break your heart - we're here to heal it. This next story, about a handsome orange boy who "flirted" with a human to be adopted, is one with a happy ending. You see, it's not every day that a man opens his car for a sweet stray cat to just fall asleep in for hours. But that was the day he also drove him home to his girlfriend (and the many other animals they raise together). A warm bed and a vet visit later, and this handsome feline fellow is flourishing. What can we say, we're beaming with purride over this caring couple who took time, money, and effort to nurture this cat back to health.

Is your inbox feline too professional? Add some cats falling off counters. Subscribe here!

Daylight Saving Time is soon… which means you can use all of the sunshine you can get. Feline funnies are a great way of warming and brightening up your day, so stick with us here to indulge in some of the most comedic cat comedy posts on the meowrket!

Cozy fall days are usually spent wrapped in cable-knit blankets and drinking warm tea, our felines by our sides and our candles perfectly lit. This is the purrfect day for most of us, but sometimes, we need some vitamin D to soften our rough edges. With Daylight Saving Time imminent, it's important to remember that the darkness is temporary, and the light will come to visit us again. In the meantime, however, you have to find ways to supplement your need for some sun…

Which brings us to our favorite time of the day: cat comedy posts. If you're here, you most likely already know what goes down on this site. We are happy to provide our pet parents with the best of the best wholesome humor, and today is no exception. You had better grab a pair of sunnies… these posts feel especially bright today! Scroll below to get your day started on the bright foot.

No good deed goes unpunished, or at least that's what they say. If you feel like this sentiment speaks to you in any way, then you'll certainly enjoy the story below. It centers around two cats and their rescuer. A man found two cats crying outside a nursing home in a bush, one only a kitten and the other fully grown. He calls the humane society to get exact information on if he can take the cats or not. It's a hot summer day in the middle of Ohio, and he could see that the cats needed immediate vet attention. So he gets the approval, and he takes the cats. He rescues them, nurses them back to health, only for him to get a call from the nursing home saying that one of the residents is accusing him of stealing the cats. 

It's a bit of back and forth, but ultimately the wholesome recuing hooman who took the cats from the bush refuses to return them. He could see their life there, and how much better off they'd be if they were given up to owners who could care for them. 

The passing of a cat pawrent can be especially tough on their cat child. For while the hoomans around understand what has happened, and have to cope with that understanding, the cat child is at an immediate disadvantage, lacking the ability to completely comprehend what has happened to their pawrent.

A scary position to be in, without a doubt. But what is possibly even more terrifying is that as this late person's cat child you could be pawned off to any number of disinterested relatives or even worse the local shelter. Luckily, the story we have for you today does not go that way, and instead tells the tale of a kind and caring man who moved heaven and earth to make the transition for his late friend's cat child as smooth and painless as possible. Even if it cost him in a few scratches along the way.
 

Is your inbox feline too professional? Add some cats falling off counters. Subscribe here!

It breaks our feline-shaped hearts to see stray cats struggling outside. If money (and space) were no object, we would happily take them all in and run our own cat sanctuary pawsitively bursting with cats in need. Maybe after we marry a millionaire who is also a cat lover. A humble cat dad can dream, right?

Some cats need more help than others, though. As heartbreaking as it is to see strays who were born outside survive there, it's even more gut-wrenching to know that some of them were abandoned by their families and are now forced to live in an unfamiliar world. To go from beds to piles of leaves, from protected walls to the open air, where security is hard to come by. We can't imagine how scary, and sad, that must be.

But for every cat thrown out onto the streets, there is an angel waiting to save them. The woman in the video below spent three weeks gaining the trust of a scared stray cat, even climbing onto rooftops to be able to give her food close to her hiding spot. After a while, the cat started to allow her to come close, and the hooman was eventually able to prove that she was trustworthy. After taking her to the vet, she discovered that the cat's previous pawrents abandoned her, and upon hearing that, she decided to adopt her, naming her 'Mochi'. Mochi took time, but she believes in love again, and it just makes us so happy to see it.